Hell Ride (2008) - Cinematic biker cow manure

[ZERO]

 

+ 2nd Worst Movie of the Year

 

A crowded, comic-book style, pulpy, warm-colored poster for Larry Bishop's Hell Ride

Two motorcycle gangs, an ugly 1970s history between them, unrestrained Neanderthal-level testosterone, bikes and gazongas.

 

Hell Ride is written, co-produced and directed by Larry Bishop (Mad Dog Time (1996)), who also co-stars in it as Johnny 'Pistolero' of the Victors M.C. gang.

There's nothing here to redeem this hellish bike ride, which is dreadful within the first 5 to 10 minutes. It leaps helplessly in time with ugly presentations of its mannered, empty vessel 'characters'. Meaningless violence and no noticeable story wears on one's patience. Instead Hell Ride is like a distillation of all the crappy elements of the bygone motorcycle subgenre, which it attempts to be an homage to.

Regrettably Hell Ride is talentless to the bone; an ugly, smelly coat with no hanger or shape, and a peripheral blemish on the image of executive producer Quentin Tarantino (Jackie Brown (1997)), who was instrumental in getting it made.

 

Related post:

 

2008 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess [UPDATED III] 

 

Watch a 3-minute video from the film's Sundance premiere here

 

Cost: Unknown

Box office: 390k $

= Uncertain, but probably a mega-flop (projected return of 0.26 times its cost)

[Hell Ride premiered 21 January (Sundance Film Festival) and runs 83 minutes. Shooting took place around April 2007 in California, including in Los Angeles. The film opened #35 to a 100k $ first weekend in 82 theaters in North America, where it declined from there, grossing 213k $ (54.6 % of the total gross). The only other recorded gross comes from Japan (176k $ (45.1 % of the total gross)); but the film was also released in South Korea and Slovenia. The-numbers.com assert that the film also made 2 mil. $ on North-American video sales. If made on a likely 1.5 mil. $ budget, the film would rank as a mega-flop with a return of 0.26 times its cost. Roger Ebert gave the film a 1/4 star review, translating to a notch over this one. Bishop hasn't directed since; he has racked up 3 dubious acting credits however; the first one in Forgotten Pills (2010). Hell Ride is rotten at 10 % with a 3.50/10 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What do you think of Hell Ride?

Top 10: Best drug-themed movies reviewed by Film Excess to date

 

1. Amy (2015, documentary) - Asif Kapadia

2. Birds of Passage/Pájaros de Verano (2018) - Cristina Gallego, Ciro Guerra

3. Altered States (1980) - Ken Russell
 

4. With Blood on My Hands: Pusher II/Pusher II (2004) - Nicolas Winding Refn

5. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998) - Terry Gilliam
 

6. Easy Rider (1969) - Dennis Hopper  

7. Bad Lieutenant (1992) - Abel Ferrara

8. The French Connection (1971) - William Friedkin

9. Keep the Lights On (2012) - Ira Sachs

10. Kids (1995) - Larry Clark 

Chosen out of 51 titles labeled 'drugs'

Previous Top 10 lists:

Best action movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best adapted movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best adventure movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best big flop movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best B/W movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best true story movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best big hit movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best biopic movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best 'box office success' movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best car chases in movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best comedies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best cop movies reviewed by Film Excess to date        
Best crime movies reviewed by Film Excess to date         
Best debut movies reviewed by Film Excess to date     
Best Danish movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
Best Disney movies reviewed by Film Excess to date     
Best documentaries reviewed by Film Excess to date  
Best dramas reviewed by Film Excess to date  
Best drama-thrillers reviewed by Film Excess to date 
Best dramedies reviewed by Film Excess to date

What do you think of the list?
Which drug-themed movies would make your personal Top 10?

Land of the Dead (2005) - Romero returns to the dead with strange, underwhelming results

♥♥♥

Signed by the filmmaker, a promising, apocalyptic, dark poster for George A Romero's Land of the Dead

Some zombie fighters are corrupted by money; the ruler of the last, barricaded human city, Kaufman tries to save himself; and the zombies have gotten brainy!

Land of the Dead is written and directed by New-Yorker master filmmaker George A. Romero (There's Always Vanilla (1971)), whose 13th feature it is. It is the 4th in Romero's six-entry Dead movie series, following zombie classic Night of the Living Dead (1968), masterpiece sequel Dawn of the Dead (1978) and underground horror great Day of the Dead (1985). As may be indicated in the plot capture above, the film presents a fairly confusing narrative.
The evolution of the zombie genre is also evident in Land, as there are no longer any uncertainty of where to shoot zombies dead (in their heads.) But the film pales compared to the better horrors of the past as well as of its time, - and it isn't really scary, mostly just slimy and gross.
Simon Baker's (Heartbreak High (1996, TV-series)) protagonist could hardly be any duller, and John Leguizamo (The Hollow Point (2016)) plays an idiotic Hispanic part. Pointing up in the cast, however, are the lovely Asia Argento (Traveling Companion/Compagna di Viaggio (1996)), and Dennis Hopper (Nails (1992, TV-movie)), who makes yet another wicked villain here.

Related posts:

George A. Romero: Dario Argento: An Eye For Horror (2000, TV documentary) - Great bio-doc of master filmmaker Dario Argento (interview subject)
Night of the Living Dead (1990) - Romero and Savini hash up a superfluous remake (writer/executive producer)
Day of the Dead (1985) - Romero's underground-set zombie classic
Creepshow (1982) - Fun, campy horror anthology from King and Romero
Dawn of the Dead (1978) or, Mall of Death!
 

Romero answers 10 questions in this video

Cost: 15 mil. $
Box office: 46.7 mil. $
= Box office success (returned 3.11 times its cost)
[Land of the Dead premiered 18 June (Las Vegas CineVegas Film Festival, Nevada) and runs 97 minutes. Shooting took place in Ontario, Canada, including Toronto, and in Pennsylvania, including Pittsburgh, from October - December 2004. It is the first in the Dead film series to get an MPAA rating; some gore was toned down in the theatrical version for the R rating. The film opened #5, behind holdover hit Batman Begins, new release Bewitched, holdover hit Mr. & Mrs. Smith, and new release Herbie: Fully Loaded, to a 10.2 mil. $ first weekend in North America, where it left the top 5 in its 2nd week and grossed 20.7 mil. $ (44.3 % of the total gross). The 2nd and 3rd biggest markets were the UK with 3.8 mil. $ (9.5 %) and Japan with 2.7 mil. $ (5.8 %). Roger Ebert gave the film a 3/4 star review, translating to a notch higher than this one. Romero returned with Diary of the Dead (2007). Baker returned in Something New (2006); Argento with a voice performance in Live Freaky, Die Freaky (2006) and physically in Marie Antoinette (2006); and Hopper in House of 9 (2005). Land of the Dead is certified fresh at 74 % with a 6.64/10 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What do you think of Land of the Dead?

Easy Rider (1969) or, The 1960s Ride Again!

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An iconic poster for Dennis Hopper's Easy Rider in a ghastly yellow

Two friends complete a drug deal and start a road trip on motorcycles, which leads them to a hippie collective, a New Orleans jail, a bad trip in a cemetery and more.

Easy Rider, written by Terry Southern (Barbarella (1968)), Peter Fonda (Enemy (1990)) and co-writer-director Dennis Hopper (Chasers (1994)), is one of the most iconic and sensation-stirring American films of the 20th century and the single most responsible film for marshaling in the New Hollywood period of young filmmakers with license to experiment that enriched the cinematic output of the country in the 1970s. - But does that naturally entail that it is a masterpiece or even a great film? I think not.
When Jack Nicholson (The Last Tycoon (1976)) enters Easy Rider, it attains a power and a natural center that it lacks before his arrival. SPOILER But then he dies, and later the two leads (Fonda and Hopper) go the same way.
The good things in Easy Rider, principally, are the scenes of driving and nature, which contains fantastic beauty, along with a few other scenes such as the cemetery trip scene. The music in the film and portrait of its time is also a huge part of its lingering attraction. However, I don't feel any romantic connection to the late-60s era or the hippies the film idolize, and perhaps as a consequence, ultimately, Easy Rider continues to strike me as a somewhat boring and overrated film with a very thin plot.

Related posts:

Dennis Hopper: Top 10: Best drug-themed movies reviewed by Film Excess to date
24 - season 1 (2001) - TV action milestone (actor)
Blue Velvet (1986) or, The Strange World (actor) 
Apocalypse Now (1979) Redux version - The horror of war (actor)

Watch the intro from the film here

Cost: Listed as 360k $ - but additional music license cost of 1 mil. $ rises the overall cost to 1.36 mil. $
Box office: 60 mil. $
= Mega-hit
[Easy Rider premiered 12 May (Cannes) and runs 95 minutes. Fonda and Hopper developed the film as a deeper reflection upon their times and the youth revolt and personal experiences on films such as The Wild Angels (1966) and The Trip (1967). Nicholson's part was initially to have gone to Rip Torn, who became antagonized by Hopper's distaste for Texans and 'rednecks', being a Texan himself. In the 1990s, he successfully sued Hopper for defamation, after he had claimed on Jay Leno's late night talk show that Torn had pulled a knife on him as part of their disagreement. The record of Hopper's wild and self-aggrandizing behavior during the making of Easy Rider is long and elaborate. Shooting took place from March - May 1968 in Louisiana, New Mexico, California and Arizona. The cast and crew reportedly held their wrap party and then found out that they still needed to shoot the final scene. Hopper initially proposed a 220 minute cut of the film, which is not in existence today, just as other lengthy cuts of the film are deemed lost. The film became the 3rd highest-grossing film of 69, making 41.7 mil. $ (69.5 % of the total gross) in North America. It got nominated for 2 Oscars: Best Supporting Actor (Nicholson), lost to Gig Young in They Shoot Horses, Don't They?, and Best Original Screenplay, lost to William Goldman for Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. The film was also nominated for a Golden Globe, and a BAFTA; it won a Best First Work award in Cannes and more. Easy Rider is certified fresh at 89 % with an 8 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What do you think of Easy Rider?

Blue Velvet (1986) or, The Strange World

♥♥♥♥♥♥

A strong, expressionistic German poster for David Lynch's Blue Velvet with the disturbed white picket fences, a dark and menacing scene, a voyeur and the soothing and mysterious blue surrounding it all

A college student finds a severed human ear in a field in his hometown, and is attracted by its mystery into an investigation with the help of a fellow student. This leads them into an unexpected underworld of sex and violence.

 

Blue Velvet is written and directed by Montanan master filmmaker David Lynch (Eraserhead (1977)), whose 4th feature it is.
It is an American masterpiece and one of Lynch's best films, - although he has made several truly great films. Despite its mystery, it is a fairly straight story, at least compared to other Lynch mystery films like the good Lost Highway (1997), the great Mulholland Drive (2001) and the enigmatic, disturbing last feature he has made, Inland Empire (2006).
Kyle McLachlan (Twin Peaks (1990-1991)) plays the curious, latent voyeur youth with great intensity, and Laura Dern (Wild at Heart (1990)) is sincere and troubling as his helper. Isabella Rossellini (Joy (2015)) came out of the shadows of her ancestral roots (her parents are film legends Ingrid Bergman and Roberto Rossellini) with her stunning, subordinate performance, and Dennis Hopper (Apocalypse Now (1979)) got a career comeback as the menacing, perverse Frank Booth. Hopper is said to have been Lynch's third choice for the part, (perhaps due to his reputation as being unstable, an addict and ... well, crazy), but he eventually got the part, and he has said that upon accepting it, he said; "I've got to play Frank! I am Frank!" (Which is pretty disturbing, if you've seen the film.)
Blue Velvet is like a tightly composed rabbit-hole with its tagline, 'It's a strange world', looming largely over it. It shows how the surface of even the seemingly most normal, idyllic and wholesome little town is in truth as fickle as blue velvet, because it is inhabited by people, and people everywhere have weird stuff crawling all around inside of them, just waiting for the tiny snap somewhere that will let that stuff come oozing out.
The first half of the film pulls you in completely with its unusual crime mystery and eroticism, and from then on the brilliance of the tale has you in its firm grip until long after the last shot has disappeared from the screen. The songs of Blue Velvet and its score by Angelo Badalamenti (Secretary (2002)) also stays with you and resonates the film's universe, whenever you hear them again thenceforth.

 

Related posts:

 

David Lynch: Top 10: Best films about filmmaking

2006 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess [UPDATED II]

2006 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess [UPDATED I]

2006 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess 

Inland Empire (2006) - Dern stands out in Lynch's nightmarish art film epic

Top 10: Best erotic movies reviewed by Film Excess to date 

Dune (1984) - Lynch heads to space, with an (unsurprisingly) strange result

Top 10: The best biopic movies reviewed by Film Excess to date

The Elephant Man (1980) - Lynch's deeply moving second feature

Eraserhead (1977) - Lynch's extraordinary, unconquerably strange and surreal debut

 

Watch a trailer for the film here

Cost: 6 mil. $
Box office: 8.5 mil. $ (North America only)
= Uncertain but likely a box office success (projected return of 3.33 times its cost)

[Blue Velvet premiered 20 August (Montréal World Film Festival) and runs 120 minutes. Lynch's script had been around for some years, before Dino De Laurentiis agreed to finance the film. Shooting took place from August - December 1985 in North Carolina. The film opened #13 to a 798k $ first weekend in 98 theaters in North America, where it peaked at #12 and in 188 theaters (different weeks), grossing 8.5 mil. $. Regrettably the foreign numbers have not been made public online, but chances are that the film did good business, perhaps as much as 20 mil. $ total. It was nominated for 1 Oscar, Best Director, lost to Oliver Stone for Platoon. It was also nominated for 2 Golden Globes, won 1/7 Independent Spirit award nominations, among other honors. Roger Ebert gave it a 1/4 star review, translating to 6 notches under this one. Lynch returned with The French as Seen by... (1988, miniseries) and theatrically with Wild at Heart (1990). Machlachlan returned in The Hidden (1987); Rossellini in Oci Ciornie (1987); and Hopper in Hoosiers (1986). Blue Velvet is certified fresh at 95 % with a 8.80/10 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What do you think of Blue Velvet?

24 - season 1 (2001) - The TV action milestone

♥♥♥♥♥

The stars of Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran's 24 season 1

Counter-terrorist agent Jack Bauer does whatever is necessary to prevent the assassination of  presidential candidate David Palmer, the first black candidate in American history, in the hectic 24 hours in which his teenage girl is also kidnapped, his wife suffers amnesia etc. etc. etc.

24 is the great modern action suspense series. Its innovative real-time format heightens the show, and the multi-layered stories are often hugely captivating
Kiefer Sutherland's (Melancholia (2011)) great comeback role as Jack Bauer is a great modern hero, navigating between complex situations and threats with cut-throat determination and at the constant risk of making mistakes. Ultimately a warm present for the new, radical anti-terror legislation of presidents Bush and later Obama, 24 is a show where terrorists are often tortured or shot in the field with total justification. It is not a show with much after-thought or reflection in that regard, although the first seasons are more insightful and realistic than late ones. As such it is a perfect product for Fox.
Creators Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran (24 (2008), both) are veterans in TV; they did the Michael Chiklis-starring police comedy series The Commish together from 1991-95.
The role of Kim Bauer (Elisha Cuthbert (House of Wax (2005))) is an annoying know-it-all teen from episode 3 onward, a major problem for the season. Furthermore the dramatic situations that she gets into along the way become increasingly unbelievable. She is probably there for promotional and demographic reasons, but should clearly have been killed off in my opinion.
The show was not a sure hit: Fox initially commissioned just the first 13 episodes, treading into the expensive venture lightly. The plot line is a bit influenced by that unideal touch-and-go-policy.
Dennis Haysbert (Dear White People (2014)) and Penny Johnson Jerald (NCIS (2009-10)) as the future presidential couple are brilliant in the melodramatic political/family struggles in the second half of the season. In good supporting parts are Zach Grenier (Curb Your Enthusiasm (2001), TV-series) as a spin doctor swine, and Xander Berkeley (Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)) as an office-running minor psychopath.
24 is a great show and Haysbert and Sutherland are much of the reason for it, along with the show's exciting editing scheme, - as when video windows grow and diminish in multi-image layouts, - and great sound and composing work, by Sean Callery (Homeland (2011-15)). The first season is an extraordinary production and the start of the longest running espionage show in television history. - Great TV!

Best episodes:

8: 7 - 8 AM - written by Surnow, Cochran, Michael Loceff (La Femme Nikita (2000-01)); directed by Stephen Hopkins (The Life and Death of Peter Sellers (2004))
SPOILER Jack diverts the first assassination plot.

20 : 7 - 8 PM - written by Surnow, Cochran, Howard Gordon (Homeland (2011-15)); directed by Hopkins
SPOILER Jack is captured and taken to a secret prison, and the main villain, Victor Drazen, is revealed to be played by Dennis Hopper (Speed (1994))! - Quite a surprise treat!

Related posts:

24 - season 2 (2002-03) - The Bomb
24 - season 3 (2003-04) - Viral suspense peak of great show

Sarah Clarke (Twilight (2008)) as Nina Myers in Robert Cochran and Joel Surnow's 24 season 1

Kiefer Sutherland gives an interview about the first season here

Cost: Unknown
Box office: None - TV-series
= Uncertainty
[24 season 1 was originally shown 6 November 2001 - 21 May 2002 and runs 24 43-minute episodes, (approximately 1,032 minutes in total.) Cochran and Surnow got the idea for the show together in the IHoP in Woodland Hills, LA. The premiere was moved due to 9/11. After Sutherland won the Golden Globe for Best Actor - TV Drama, Fox decided to order the last 11 episodes. The season averaged 8.6 mil. viewers in the US. It was shown the world over; in the UK on BBC, where it was their biggest hit show ever. The DVD release was also #1 in the UK, and 24's strong DVD sales are thought to have been a big part of why the ratings for the later seasons increased. The season was nominated for 10 Emmys, winning 2: Best Writing for a TV-series and Outstanding Picture Editing for a Series. The show has ended its run now after 9 seasons and a TV-movie. It was remade in India in 2013. 24 season 1 is fresh at 100 % with an 8.85/10 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What is your favorite 24 season?
What do you think of the first season?