The Inglorious Bastards/Quel Maledetto Treno Blindato (1978) - Castellari's WWII exploitation charmer

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Nude women, explosions, war machinery and macho violence is vividly promised on this self-tooting poster for Enzo G. Castellari's The Inglorious Bastards

A small group of captured American soldiers are on their way to execution in France in 1944, when a flat tire allows them to alter their trajectory: Towards freedom in Switzerland, killing as many 'krauts' on their way as possible!

 

The Inglorious Bastards is written by Sandro Continenza (Sbirulino (1982)), Sergio Grieco (Il Sergente Klems (1971)), Franco Marotta (Lucia (2005, TV movie)), Romano Migliorini (Bandidos (1967)) and Laura Toscano (De Moda (2004-05)), with Alberto Piferi (Salomé (1986)) contributing dialog, and directed by Enzo G. Castellari (Payment in Blood/7 Winchester per un Massacro (1967)). The original Italian title translates to 'that damned armored train'.

How this many individuals could have written this film together is just one of the incredible things about it. The story is generally not the easiest to relate. 

Bo Svenson (Icarus (2010)) plays the 'bastards'' alpha leader, and he does so with a rapscallion charm, which really permeates the entire group, despite the dire war that they find themselves in. This is all part of the fun and ruckus, with plenty of gunpowder and bullets, and Italian film tricks of the era. The Inglorious Bastards is a real charmer.

 

Watch a trailer for the film here

 

Cost: Unknown

Box office: Unknown

= Uncertain

[The Inglorious Bastards was released 8 February (Italy) and runs 99 minutes. Shooting took place in Italy, including in Rome. The production reportedly suffered the trouble of having all of their weapons seized by the authorities halfway through production, due to the Italian Prime Minister's recent kidnapping and murder by the Red Brigade terrorists. New blank-fire prop weapons had to be created fast for the completion of the film. Details concerning the film's budget and box office performance are regrettably not online, but it was widely released in Europe and sold impressive 62k tickets in the small market Denmark, (approximately 453k $), indicating that it was likely a hit. It is not listed as having had a North-American release until 1981. Quentin Tarantino bought the rights to remake the film, although he only reused the title for his Inglorious Basterds (2009). Castellari returned with Sensività (1979). Svenson returned in Il Figlio dello Sceicco (1978); Fred Williamson (Boss Nigger (1974)) in 6 TV credits prior to his theatrical return in Il Cappotto di Legno (1981). 10k+ IMDb users have given The Inglorious Bastards a 6.5/10 average rating.]

What do you think of The Inglorious Bastards?

Hot Shots! Part Deux (1993) - Laugh your pants off

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+ Best Big Hit Movie of the Year + Best Spoof of the Year  

 

Star Sheen fires off a shocked rooster from a bow on this dead-pan hilarious poster for Jim Abrahams' Hot Shots! Part Deux

Harley Topper has gone into exile somewhere in Asia, but he is brought back home to the States for an important mission: Save the soldiers, who were supposed to save some American hostages of Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein, but who has instead also been taken hostages themselves.

 

Hot Shots! Part Deux is written by co-writer/co-producer Pat Proft (Ringo (1978, TV-movie)) and great Wisconsinite filmmaker, co-writer/director Jim Abrahams (Airplane! (1980)). It is the sequel to the pair's huge hit Hot Shots! (1991).

This comedy hits the mark: One almost cries out in laughter, and everything just seems tighter than in the already hilarious first film: The gags, the references, the guest appearances (including Rowan Atkinson (The Lion King (1994))!) and the howlingly funny scenes. Charlie Sheen (Scary Movie 3 (2003)) is a riot in Hot Shots! Part Deux.

 

Related posts:

Jim Abrahams: 1993 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess

Hot Shots! (1991) - Abrahams and Co. present another rip-roaring spoof comedy

Top 10: Best comedies reviewed by Film Excess to date 

Airplane! (1980) - The deadpan/spoof/crazy-comedy classic!

 

Watch a 2-minute clip from the movie here

 

Cost: 25 mil. $

Box office: 133.7 mil. $

= Big hit (returned 5.34 times its cost)

[Hot Shots! Part Deux was released 21 May (USA) and runs 86 minutes. Sheen was paid 4 mil. $ for his performance, and worked out voraciously to beef up for the part. Shooting took place from October 1992 - January 1993 in California, including in Los Angeles. The film opened #2, behind Sliver, to a 10.2 mil. $ first weekend in North America, where it spent another 2 weekends in the top 5 (#5-#5), grossing 38.9 mil. $ (29.1 % of the total gross). Roger Ebert gave the film a 3/4 star review, translating to a notch under this one. Abrahams returned with An Introduction to the Ketogenic Diet (1994, video documentary), ...First Do No Harm (1997, TV movie) and theatrically with Mafia! (1998). Sheen returned in Deadfall (1993). Hot Shots! Part Deux is rotten at 56 % with a 5.60/10 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What do you think of Hot Shots! Part Deux?

The Heroes of Telemark (1965) - Excitement abounds in boy's dream K. Douglas war adventure

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A fabulous painted poster full of scenes of drama and action for Anthony Mann's The Heroes of Telemark

The story of how the German lead on the nuclear front during World War II in their hydro plant in Norway was stopped in the last second by Norwegian resistance fighters and British soldiers.

 

The Heroes of Telemark is written by Ben Barzman (Oasis (1955)), Ivan Moffat (Giant (1956)) and Harold Pinter (Reunion (1989)), based on the novels Skis Against the Atom (1953) by Knut Haukelid and But for These Men (1962) by John Drummond, and directed by Anthony Mann (Dr. Broadway (1942)).

Kirk Douglas (Spartacus (1960)) is a fantastic scientist/old pig here, who only thinks of himself, but who (of course) transforms into the greatest hero of the Telemark nonetheless. (Telemark is a region in Southern Norway.) As a Norwegian he is, naturally, incredibly unbelievable, and his greased-up hairdo doesn't move a quarter of an inch throughout the truth-based action adventure.

At one moment black and white footage of planes are placed in the film in what comes off as a silly ploy. But otherwise this is a highly thrilling war movie in the vein of The Guns of Navarone (1961) and Where Eagles Dare (1968). It may be second to those films, but The Heroes of Telemark has a rare and exciting cross-country skiing chase that puts the nerves on alert!

 

Related posts:

Anthony Mann: El Cid (1961) - Charlton Heston unites Spain in Mann's glorious epic 

Cimarron (1960) - A fine epic western settler adaptation 

 

 

Watch a trailer for the film here

 

Cost: 5-5.6 mil. $ (different reports)

Box office: 1.65 mil. $ (North-American rentals; according to Variety, 1967)

= Uncertain

[The Heroes of Telemark premiered 23 November (London) and runs 130 minutes. Shooting took place from November 1964 - ? in England and Norway, including in Oslo. The North-American rental gross listed above says little about the actual box office gross. The film was among the 15th highest-grossing of the year in the UK. William Darby's Anthony Mann biography records that the film made "modest box office business". Mann returned with A Dandy in Aspic (1968). Douglas returned in The Lucy Show (1966, TV-series) and theatrically in Cast a Giant Shadow (1966); Richard Harris (Ravagers (1979)) in The Bible: In the Beginning... (1966). 7.1k+ IMDb users have given The Heroes of Telemark a 6.5/10 average rating.]

 

What do you think of The Heroes of Telemark? 

Midway (2019) - Emmerich's big WWII turkey

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+ 2nd Worst Movie of the Year

+ Most Deserved Flop of the Year  

 

Glossy stars and huge explosions outline this good-looking poster for Roland Emmerich's Midway

The relationship with the increasingly hostile Japanese had gradually deteriorated ahead of the devastating Pearl Harbor attacks on the US Navy in Hawaii in December 1940. The Pacific Theater gets a decisive battle in Midway.

 

Midway is written by Wes Tooke (Jean-Claude Van Johnson (2017, TV-series)) and directed by Roland Emmerich (Franzmann (1979)).

Variegated and uninteresting, Emmerich here gives us his version of the famous Battle of Midway, which feels at least as phony and super-glossed as Michael Bay's Pearl Harbor (2001). Filled with wide-angled effects shots, which impress, but their feeling subsides fast, and then it doesn't help Midway that most will have Christopher Nolan's masterpiece Dunkirk (2017) still in fresh memory.

The whole starry cast of Midway are wasted in respectful, historical parts: Foremost stands Ed Skrein (The Model (2016)) in an awful, scenery-chewing performance with a horrible New York accent as the film's hero, who is named Dick Best, (no kidding!) Credit titles ascertain that he was real enough, but it just, regrettably, doesn't seem like it during the elapsed movie.

 

Related posts:

Roland Emmerich: 2019 in films - according to Film Excess [UPDATED I]

White House Down (2013) or, Duck, Mr. President!
2009 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess [UPDATED I]    
2012 (2009) or, Giant Mega-Stupid Movie!

2008 in films and TV-series - according to Film Excess [UPDATED II] 
2008 in films - according to Film Excess [UPDATED I]
2008 in films - according to Film Excess

10,000 BC (2008) - Emmerich's mammoth turkey 

 

Watch a trailer for the film here

 

Cost: 100 mil. $

Box office: 127.4 mil. $

= Big flop (returned 1.27 times its cost)

[Midway premiered 24 October (Germany) and runs 138 minutes. Emmerich had attempted to get the film green-lit by a major studio since the 1990s, without luck. His assembling the budget of 100 mil. $ makes it one of the costliest independent movies of all time. 15 companies and governmental support bodies were involved in the financing and making of the film. Shooting took place from September - December 2018 in Hawaii and in Montreal, Québec. It opened #1 to a 17.8 mil. $ first weekend in North America, where it spent another two weekends in the top 5 (#2-#5), grossing 56.8 mil. $ (44.6 % of the total gross). The 2nd and 3rd biggest markets were China with 42 mil. $ (33 %) and South Korea with 7.3 mil. $ (5.7 %). Lionsgate reportedly spent 40 mil. $ promoting the film. Emmerich returns with Moonfall (2022). Skrein returned in Naked Singularity (2021). Midway is rotten at 42 % with a 5.20/10 critical average at Rotten Tomatoes.]

What do you think of Midway?